19 The Namer
The Namer
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Air Date: July 13, 2015 Episode Link
Previous Episode Episode 19 Next Episode
Hosts: Arnie, Chunt, Usidore Guests: Merlinda Flimpery the Namer
Producers: Arnie Niekamp, Evan Jacover, Ryan DiGiorgi
Editor: Ryan DiGiorgi Theme Music: Andy Poland Episode Art: Sadieh Rifai
Sponsored by: Cards Against Humanity via The Chicago Podcast Cooperative

Description

"Merlinda Flimpery is a Namer. She gives things names. That’s a thing in Foon."

Summary

Arnie welcomes Merlinda Flimpery, a mystical namer, which is a sacred and highly regarded job in Foon. If you are a mystical creature, and someone guesses your name, you lose a lot of your power, so a namer will accept payment for giving people names that are fitting but not easily guessed. To show off her skills, Merlinda gives a list of rejected names:

  • Lort Dimpleberry
  • Farnswhimple Humblebottom
  • Kimsterly Dadbod
  • Blippy Nogginfriend
  • Kidney Dapplewheel
  • Scratchity Gingerskin
  • Flapjacks-in-Slipperybowl
  • Shishkerly Handmusic
  • Hildy Saltygrain
  • Highdalee Hoodalay
  • Squashedup Toboggan

Merlinda tells about her past, and impressed by her life story, Usidore asks if she will join his quest to defeat The Dark Lord. She promises him that some clients owe her some favors, and tells him to contact her if he ever has to cross a bridge. We find out that the famous Rumplestiltskin was one of her clients. She also has brought two real names (though not sacred names) for each of the gang:

Chunt's Names:

  • Snickerty Scumbottom
  • Doubleheiny Fingerstink

Usidore's Names:

  • Blowbitty Spellstealer
  • Gravevoice L'Falsie

Arnie's Names:

  • Veda Saltenfoose
  • Carnival Wilson

Impressed by Arnie's name "Carnival Wilson", Usidore asks him if he will join him on his quest immediately. Arnie asks Merlinda if she helped The Dark Lord choose his name, at which point her eyes glaze over and she avoids the question. It appears that she might be physically incapable of answering the question due to a namer's pact or curse, and Usidore forgives her if she did help The Dark Lord. We also find out that the secret name Chunt gave the tiny horse with two buttholes is "Highstranger L'Feur".

Rumor of the Week

Spintax the Green is translating the Pandenomicon into Dwarvish to impress a young, eager bisectual dwarf.

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Additional Appearances

Earth References

Rapunzel - Merlinda was raised captive in a tower
Pythagorean Theorem - Merlinda seems to have worked it out escaping from the tower where she was raised, but, ironically, there is no name for the concept in Foon.

Notes

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