| Singing Sword from I.T. | |
| Offices & Bosses episode | |
| Air Date | January 25, 2017 |
| Episode No. | Season 1, Ep 3 |
| Episode Link | |
| Hosts | |
| Arnie, aka Orlando Bloom: Arnie Niekamp Chunt, aka Dan Smith: Adal Rifai Usidore, aka John Bastion: Matt Young |
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| Guest appearance(s) | |
| Metamore: Bill Arnett The Singing Sword, aka Gail Davidson-Durst: Erica Elam McLeroy Brothers and Old Man: Justin, Griffen, Trevor and Clint McElroy Mysterious Man: Tim Sniffen |
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| Production | |
| Producer(s) | Arnie Niekamp, Ryan DiGiorgi, Evan Jacover |
| Editor | Chris Rathjen |
| Production assistance | Garrett Schultz |
| Theme Music | Andy Poland |
| Associate Producer | {$associateproducer} |
| Logo | Allard Laban |
| Episode chronology | |
| ← Previous | Next → |
| "Krom From I.T." | "Caball'on from I.Tree" |
"Singing Sword from I.T." is the third episode of the Offices & Bosses miniseries. It was originally released on January 25, 2017.
Description
The Singing Sword joins our heroes for a battle in a Panera. There is stabbing.
Summary
The office workers return for their third play session. Arnie is starting to appreciate Offices & Bosses more, though neither Flower nor Krom are available to play. Instead, Arnie has invited the Singing Sword to play Gail Davidson-Durst. She has never been out without Jak Vorpal before and is very excited to be there. Indeed, she has never played any game besides ‘stab’. Usidore reveals that he has painted a miniature of his character, John Bastion. However, when Arnie suggests that the colours are not drab enough, Usidore devours the pewter figure. The players take time to discuss their characters’ goals for the future.
The characters find themselves at a Panera where Erin is sitting by herself, but Dan Smith (Chunt) recognises her friend Diane from the Department of Labor at another table. Smith goes to talk to her, but since she is on her lunch break he disengages from the conversation. Meanwhile, Bastion invites Erin to join him, Orlando Bloom, and Gail Davidson-Durst. Erin asks about Bastion getting fired. Erin says the rumor is that Roz has the real numbers hidden in her office. Bloom and Davidson-Durst make their excuses and leave Bastion alone with Erin.
Suddenly, a large group of men enter the Panera. They are having a loud business-y lunch. The spill Diane’s hot drink into her lap and laugh. Smith tries to confront them but fails. However, Davidson-Durst is able to stab the leader to death with her chicken salad. Bastion casts a freeze spell into Diane’s lap. Diane and Bastion talk, but he needs to defeat the bullies.
Bloom gets his sword out to attack the other men, but his move is largely ineffectual. One of the men throws a mechanical pencil at Davidson-Durst, stabbing her in the shoulder. Another shoots lightning from his cell phone at Smith and fries his brain. The third guy sees Bastion and attempts to sling his briefcase at him but misses. On his next move, Bloom kills one of the men. Davidson-Durst contemplates running away; Arnie checks in with the Singing Sword to see how she feels about being stabbed.
After the break, Arnie shows off the Orlando Bloom figurine that he had in his Camry. He admits that he owns five Orlando Bloom action figures. Singing Sword has carved an image to Gail Davidson-Durst into the tabletop.
Davidson-Durst wants to seduce one of the bullies, but rolls a 2. While they are distracted, Bastion hits one of them in the neck with his messenger bag. There is one bully left. Since his brain has been “scrambies”, Smith calls the workplace and tries to feign sickness. He then tries to pluck out the eyes of the remaining man, but is not entirely successful. Bloom tries to persuade the man to lean forward so that Smith can take his eyes.
A Panera manager offers the team lunch on the house. He also gives them a Green Apron of Protection, a Tag of Many Names, and a Loyalty Card. The manager also gives Davidson-Durst a magical Container of To Go.
After the game finishes, Singing Sword reveals that she stabbed Can the Yellow outside the Vermilion Minotaur and left him bleeding.
Foon sponsor
The McElroy Brothers for The Smoldering Widow, eating here is the only adventure you'll ever need.
Earth references
- Little People, Big World
- Law & Order
- CSI
- Staples
- Office Max
- Unbreakable
- Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
- Elizabethtown
- Hugo Weaving
- Benedict Cumberbatch
- "To Scale"
- Vocal fry
- Panera Bread
- Half Sandwich and Soup
- Bread Bowl
- Elmer's Glue
- Yankee swap
- Jeggings
- Working Girl
- Candid photo
Notes
Next word in your secret phrase: really