Season 1, Ep 48 - DQ Returns
DQ Returns
Hello from the Magic Tavern episode
Air date February 8, 2016
Episode no. S01E48
Episode Link
Hosts Arnie, Chunt, Usidore
Guests D'athaniel Quen'yarvin
Producers Arnie Niekamp, Evan Jacover, Ryan DiGiorgi
Associate Producer {$associateproducer}
Editor Ryan DiGiorgi
Episode art Vaughn Pinpin
Theme music Andy Poland
Audio assistance Jason Knox
Jackbox Games via The Chicago Podcast Cooperative
Episode chronology
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"DQ Returns" is the forty-eighth episode of season one of Hello from the Magic Tavern. It was originally released on February 8, 2016. This episode features Tim Ryder as the elf D'athaniel Quen'yarvin.


"I’m going to try to keep Blemish in line while we chat with our old pal D’athaniel Quen’yarvin. Maybe I’ll say his name right this time."


Arnie asks about how things are going at Chu Chu's Chow, and they are going "good to great". They are still in a lot of debt, but again, aren't worried because no one dares try collect from Usidore, the fact that he is unstabbable being one reason. Chunt pokes Arnie with a stick to see if he is stabbable. He is and it hurts. Arnie is still "co-in charge" of the Vermilion Minotaur, and his job has mostly consisted keeping an eye on Blemish, and making sure he goes in the back if he does anything creepy (which is often). Blemish wants to make some changes to incorporate more cats and darkness, such as allowing cats to roam freely, adding more feline theme to the tavern, and painting the walls black. Chunt mishears "cats and darkness" as "cats and doctors" and thinks that might be a fun game.

Today's guest is D'athaniel Quen'yarvin or DQ as Arnie must call him. Arnie is still having trouble pronouncing his name, which offends DQ. Arnie tries his hardest to get it right, but the way he says it just sounds like the word to call an eagle, which reminds DQ of how he was teased in school. Everyone notices that DQ has a great voice, and Usidore and Chunt hint that he should simply take over Arnie's podcast. Chunt asks if DQ has gotten any better at the bow since last time. He has since realized archery is not his strength, and has put all his time and effort into getting better at kicking, and now wears steel toed boots with a spike on them. Also, since his last appearance, DQ confronted his mother, who admitted that a tree did not actually take his father, Darth'raniel Quen'yarvin, and that his father is still alive but has not contacted DQ yet.

DQ has also used his kicking skills to open a woodworking shop, using all of the trees he has kicked down. The shop is called Elf on a Shelf and makes vintage and worn furniture. The "vintage" and worn" look is currently very popular in Foon because everything anyone has is old and worn out. Usidore asks DQ to make him a shelf to store his staff and sword, and DQ suggests putting a hole in an existing shelf so they can fit vertically. DQ is excited about this and all his work, because kicking is his passion and has finally found what he's good at. Blemish asks DQ to add "presented by Blemish" to the Vermilion Minotaur's sign.

After the break, Arnie admits that DQ's voice is very good. DQ has also branched out into other areas, such as fitness, where he runs a martial arts-based exercise group for maidens who are tired of boating, or Ti-Bo for short. Elf on the Shelf also will ship furniture to anywhere in Foon. Chunt, in the meantime, is ready to test his brand new card game Cats and Doctors. He hands each player a card. Each card will have a role written on it, and it is up to each player to roleplay that role as Chunt to pretend to have an ailment. Usidore gets Cat, DQ gets Cat-Doctor, and Arnie gets a dick. Even though Chunt drew the card, he notes that Arnie "plays the dick card" quite often. Blemish gets Doctor, but spits a cat out of his mouth anyway.

After they read emails, Arnie talks about the Earth adventures of Spintax the Green, as told through Spintax's twitter account. They then play another round of Cats and Doctors.

Space Bunker Plot

As the Mysterious Man closes out the episode, Craig approaches him with a distress call. The transmission has Kern begging for help as there is an intruder on board his ship. It turns out to be Tricia who crashed into his ship and Kerm gives a warm welcome and tells her that they are in the Gresforn galaxy. Unfortunately, they are now both marooned. Now the Mysterious Man and Craig have to monitor this development. Craig just asks for him and Tricia to be exchanged so Craig can go home, but is left in silence.

Post Credit Scene

Arnie sings the "Charles' in Charge" theme.


  • A listener offers Chunt some more knowledge about Earth stuff, and explains what the movie Grease is, as well as a description of New York and Broadway. They also list several song titles from Grease:
    • Beach Times (We Went To The Beach Over The Summer)
    • Cars In Charge
    • Zoom Into My Heart
    • You're The Juan That I Want
    • Do Me A Favor (Popcorn)
  • What's to stop the Dark Lord's followers from saying his true name over and over again until he becomes unstoppable? Does Usidore get similar power from having his name spoken aloud? The Dark Lord's followers do indeed chant his name, but doing so makes a crack in their soul, and if they said it too much, they would be devoured. Usidore does get power from saying his name aloud, that's why he says it so often. Usidore does also have a tiny crack in his soul from saying the Dark Lord's true name once.
  • A listener gives Arnie an inspirational message loosely based on the song "Hold On".

Foon sponsor

Kellory Potter of Kellory Pottery is having a big sale. A witch kidnapped her family and is holding them hostage. If she doesn't sell all her pottery, the witch is going to eat her children.

New Characters

Recurring Characters

Earth references

  • The Elf on a Shelf
  • Hipsters
  • ASMR (Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response)
  • Tae Bo
  • Darth Vader
  • Grease
  • Charles in Charge
  • This is 40
  • “Hold On” — Wilson Phillips
  • MDMA (ecstacy)


Behind the scenes

DQ Returns
Image Unavailable
Blemish, DQ, Usidore, Chunt, Arnie
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