Offices and Bosses 5: The I.T. Team
The I.T. Team
Offices & Bosses episode
Offices & Bosses
Episode no. Season 1
Episode 5
Produced by Arnie Niekamp
Ryan DiGiorgi
Evan Jacover
Editing by Ryan DiGiorgi
Theme music by Andy Poland
Production assistance by Garrett Schultz
Logo by Allard Laban
Original air date February 8, 2017
Hosts
Arnie Niekamp as Arnie as Orlando Bloom
Adal Rifai as Chunt as Dan Smith
Matt Young as Usidore as John Bastion
Guest appearance(s)
Tim Sniffen as Mysterious Man
Bill Arnett as Metamore
Mark Logsdon as Krom the Fingarian as Gail Davidson
Brooke Breit as Flower as Gail Durst
Kat Kuhl and James D’Amato as Musa and Koji
Episode chronology
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"Caball'on from I.Tree" "Teachers and Classrooms"

"The I.T. Team" is the fifth episode of the Offices & Bosses miniseries. It was originally released on February 8, 2017.

Everything comes to a head at the office Holiday Party.

Summary

Krom the Fingarian is excited to be back since he feels like himself playing Gail Davidson-Durst when he otherwise has trouble expressing himself. Flower enters the room and is upset that they’ve been playing Offices & Bosses without her. Flower proposes that she split the character Gail with Krom, since she theorizes that Gail is actually identical twins, Gail Davidson and Gail Durst, and they have been switching off coming to work the entire time. Metamore allows this, and Krom plays Gail Davidson while Flower plays Gail Durst.

The characters have snuck into the office holiday party and Yankee swap in their campaign to kill Roz Walters. They hide in the copy room, but Sam finds them there and seeks a duel with Orlando Bloom for the murder of his wife Diane, and he has his five dogs with him. Orlando throws his sword unsuccessfully at Sam. Gail Davidson scatters 500 thumb tacks on the floor all pointing up, while Gail Durst distracts the dogs by throwing a gas station ham sandwich, and the Gails strike a back-to-back pose. John Bastion takes out the shotgun he found earlier and aims it at Sam, while Orlando attacks Sam with an apology for Diane’s death. Dan Smith sneaks behind Sam to form a table behind him, which Sam trips over, falls on the tacks and dies.

The dogs are no longer distracted by the ham sandwich and surround the group. Both Gails sing “Who let the dogs out?” which gets Steve’s attention. Steve hates his job and has Roz for the office party Yankee swap. The group gets Steve to free them of the dogs if they promise to get him fired. Steve also gives them Roz for the Yankee swap.

After some shenanigans, the group find a chocolate-covered Rolo, disguise themselves and enter the office party. Kelly confronts the Gails for defecating in her desk, but she’s also confused that there are two Gails. Dan manages to confuse and distract Kelly enough that she leaves the Gails alone, and she also leaves behind a bottle of Jim Beam.

The group puts the Rolo into the Jim Beam and offer it to Roz. She notices that the bottle has been opened, and attacks everyone with her condescending tone. She takes some of the chocolate-tainted Jim Bean but it does not have an effect. After exchanging and resisting tones and groans, Roz is finally stunned. Dan forms another table behind Roz, and John pushes her over the Dan/table. While she’s injured on the floor, Orlando asks her to sign the birthday card for Dan. He helps her up and gives the signed birthday card to Dan.

Roz admits she fired John Bastian because she knew a terrible guy from high school named John Sebastian. John reveals that after high school he changed his last name from Sebastian to Bastian. The group suggests that she should rehire John and fire Steve instead. Roz asks John to prove himself by pitching his Rice Krispies campaign. John describes his pitch, which includes a mother who brings Rice Krispies treats to her children, but has to leave them to go to work. The story appeals to Roz’s guilt for not spending enough time with her children, causing her head to spin and rocket from her body. Roz is dead, and they win the campaign.

Orlando Bloom finds a small dimensional portal among the Yankee swap gifts that lead back to the blacksmith shoppe on his world. He jumps into the portal, lands face first into the blacksmith fire, and is badly burned. With Orlando Bloom permanently incapacitated, Arnie will have to play a different character next time.

Foon Sponsor

Musa and Koji for gamer gathering ElaborateCon 2017.

Earth References

  • Yankee Swap
  • "Immigrants (We Get the Job Done)" - K'naan
  • “To err is to human”
  • "Who Let the Dogs Out?" - Baha Men
  • Yankee Candle
  • Seven minutes in heaven
  • Breast exam
  • Hot AF
  • Rolos
  • Gaslighting
  • Jim Beam
  • Oh Henry! candy bar
  • Applebee's
  • Def Leppard
  • Rice Krispies squares
  • Mad Men
  • "Cat's in the Cradle" - Harry Chapin
  • Laser Tag
  • Gary Gygax
  • Quaker Oats
  • "Bodies" ("Let the Bodies Hit the Floor") - Drowning Pool

Notes

  • This is the fifth and last episode of the Offices and Bosses miniseries spinoff.
  • Final word in your secret phrase: it
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