Season 3, Ep 78 - Side Quests (w/ Jared Logan)
Season 3, Ep 78 - Side Quests (w/ Jared Logan)
Hello from the Magic Tavern episode
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Air date February 15, 2021
Episode no. S03E78
Episode Link
Cast
Hosts Arnie, Chunt, Usidore
Guests Stavrus Hook
Production
Producers Arnie Niekamp, Matt Young, Adal Rifai
Post-production coordination Garrett Schultz
Earwolf producer Kimmie Lucas
Editor Tim Joyce
Logo Allard Laban
Theme music Andy Poland
Special assistance Ryan DiGiorgi
Sponsor
Episode chronology
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List of episodes

"Side Quests" is the seventy-eighth episode of season three of Hello from the Magic Tavern. It was originally released on February 15, 2021.

Description

A strange tavern keeper is oddly invested in the weird things going on around town.

Summary

Rushing to get the podcast out on time, Arnie has already been recording the slapdash attempt to start up the podcast while the group is on the road. Chunt claims that they are broke because they have no time and time is money. The trio find themselves in a small hamlet and settle on a fairly shitty tavern called The Horse What Fell into the Mud Urban Eatery.

The group meets Stavos, the barkeep/waiter, as they try to leave the ill-kempt tavern. However, the group caves to stay and orders food and drinks from his meager menu, which includes old bread that is hard as a rock and a pint of grog with a little bit of dirt in it. After settling at the both, they finally start the podcast. Arnie fails to finish the show’s preamble as the group is cramp at the table.

When Stavos returns with their order and them some (which he still charges them for) he mentions some very huge rats that needs to be taken care of. Usidore is all gun-ho about this side quest. However, Arnie is more resistant while Chunt sees this quest as a way to pay the bill. Stavos overhears this and offers them another side quest, protecting a caravan at Bloodwater Creek which would reward them handsomely. Still, Arnie admonishes the idea of side quests.

Throughout the rest of their stay, Stavos barely leaves the group and continuously offers them quests to go on. Even Chunt’s attempts to ask about the man that is Stavos leads them to another quest about his family. Eventually, Usidore takes on the quests and goes off on his own to complete them. Stavos claims to be right behind him, but fails to leave the tavern.

Arnie and Chunt discuss what the deal about Stavos is. Theories includes that he is a ghost and cannot leave the tavern, he was raised by (non-magical, average) books, and he’s just a lonely guy. Chunt claims to take care of Stavos’s rat problem, but uses it as a ruse to explore the town. The town is a façade, making it seem like Stavos is the only one there. The gang propose different methods to cure Stavos’s loneliness, such has getting him to go one the main quest (to defeat the Dark Lord), and getting him a pet (just not Séance). Instead, Stavos would much rather give his quests and get the group to pay up. To expose Stavos’s lies, Chunt agrees to pay, but needs to go to the back, so he steps out of the tavern to the face of the bank and is stopped by another Stavos Character, who feigns unhelpfulness. Chunt goes to complain to a lawyer, only to be stopped by another Stavos character. Eventually, Stavos drops the act and admits making up quests to get people to spend time with him.

To pay their bill, Usidore is ring buddies with Stavos, Arnie gives him the Great Gatsby and Pride and Prejudice books from their book club in Season 2, and Chunt makes Usidore turn Stavos into a parent. The children came from the man he murdered for his crown during one of the side quest. After contemplating their actions over the course of the episode, Arnie remembers to say the rest of the show’s preamble.

Emails

There are no new emails this week.

New characters

Recurring Characters

Earth References

  • Peter Pan, Tiker Bell, J. M. Barrie
  • "School's Out" by Alice Cooper
  • Yule
  • Egg nog
  • No Religion by Van Morrison
  • "Blood is thicker than water"
  • * Lord of the Rings
  • "Stop hitting yourself"
  • X-Files, Skully
  • Star Wars,
    • Jedi
    • The Republic
    • "Help me Obi Wan, you're my only hope"
  • Ken Watababe
  • Cash For Gold
  • Two Wrongs don't make a Right"
  • John Newbery Medal
  • Pizza Hut's BOOK IT! Program, free personal pan pizza
  • The Great Gatsby
  • Pride and Prejudice
  • Pizza poppers
  • ‎How It Happened podcast
  • Trump administration

Notes

  • The Horse What Fell into the Mud Urban Eatery has a very interesting menu:
    • Mutton
    • Hunk of Cheese
    • Old Bread, Hard as a Rock
    • Pint of Grog (with a little bit of dirt)
    • Small Beer (beer with lots of water)
    • Big Ol' Turkey Leg
    • Meswa Salad

Behind the Scenes

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