Season 3, Ep 80 - Usidore's Hat

Season 3, Ep 80 - Usidore's Hat
Hello from the Magic Tavern episode
Air date	March 1, 2021
Episode no.	S03E80
Episode Link
Cast
Hosts	Arnie, Chunt, Usidore
Guests	none
Show Full Cast Arnie: Arnie Niekamp Chunt: Adal Rifai Usidore: Matt Young Mysterious Man: Tim Sniffen
Production
Producers	Arnie Niekamp, Matt Young, Adal Rifai
Associate Producer	{$associateproducer}
Post-production coordination	Garrett Schultz
Earwolf producer	Kimmie Lucas
Editor	Anna Havermann
Logo	Allard Laban
Theme music	Andy Poland
Special assistance	Ryan DiGiorgi
Sponsor
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Episode chronology
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"Jayme, Sayme and Daddy"	"The Wizard's Council"
List of episodes

"Usidore's Hat" is the eightieth episode of season three of Hello from the Magic Tavern. It was originally released on March 1, 2021.

Description

It's finally time to visit the tiny tavern hidden inside Usidore's hat.

Summary

Traversing the mountainside on horseback, Arnie fails to recall a time where he had ridden a horse in Foon, despite him being there for just short of 6 years and previously buying a used horse. Usidore, however, remembers his horse companions fondly, including Chode and Grimhoof. Chunt cannot recall his horse, but he can turn into one and offer a ride to Arnie, which he refuses.

Dark clouds appear before them. Usidore uses this opportunity to invite Arnie and Chunt into his hat, since he did not want to waste a guest last week. He shrinks the two down where they meet an Avatar Usidore to guide them through the tavern. After entering using the password that Avatar Usidore gave them, they enter the tavern, which is very reminiscent to the Vermilion Minotaur back in Hogsface before it was destroyed. Each of the patrons are all different versions of Usidore with distinctive personalities and characteristics. Arnie and Chunt head up to the bar to Barkeep Usidore for drinks, only for him to tell the pair that they get to drink at the tavern for free. Chunt also gets the chance to flirt with Sexy Usidore, who is very forward with him. Avatar Usidore guides Arnie and Chunt to a replica of that very table from the Vermilion Minotaur with the only exception that it has nipples. From there, they order food and meet various other Usidores. The two are also encouraged by almost every Usidore they meet to not talk to Depressed Usidore.

Arnie and Chunt distract Avatar Usidore in hopes to talk to and cheer up Depressed Usidore. He lacks the traditional manic energy that all the other Usidores have and lingers on his constant failures in regards to his quest, the protection of Arnie during The Lurking Phantom Episode, the journey to make Arnie unkillable, and the return of both Eggy Baby and Twosidore to Chunt. Arnie reminds him that its is okay for Usidore to fail and they are still friends, but since Usidore has the power to do something, it is even that more insulting. Much of Drepressed Usidore's anxiety, as well as the looming tension felt throughout the tavern stems from the upcoming Wizards' Council as there's a good chance it would be a shitshow.

The main Usidore interrupts, hoping that when Arnie and Chunt are done, they can rejoin him as he is lonely without them. Even he says not to talk to Depressed Usidore. But as Arnie and Chunt get Depressed Usidore to open up more, Depressed Usidore has already resigned his abilities and tells the group to join the Dark Lord's forces since he already has obtained so much power. The two realized that this Usidore is the Usidore without hope and a fucking coward. Avatar Usidore shoos away Depressed Usidore and the group discuss how to deal with the things that upsets them; a wholesome conversation to a rather comical episode. They close out the episode doing a role call to the rest of the Usidores and an email.

Emails

A Canadian Fan, Kay, is a geologist that started listening to the podcast around August 2020. Although they do not have a question, they offer some knowledge on how to obtain more obsidian, since Foon has a scarce amount. Since obsidian is essentially volcanic glass, they could make more by having a volcano erupt near an ocean and mine the new supply. Avatar Usidore says this information could be useful, however, many of the volcanos in Foon are controlled by the Dark Lord. If they could traverse the dimension, Kay offered their own supply. Arnie suggest an episode on top of a volcano, which Usidore sarcastically thanks Kay for.

New characters

Although there are no new guests, there are many variants of Usidore (referred to as Usidore Zero for the remainder of the list):

Avatar Usidore or Regular Usidore- the Usidore the acts as Usidore Zero's proxy as Arnie and Chunt are shrunk down. He has all the names of Usidore Zero. He has also had a fling with almost every Usidore in the Tavern. He has the same names as Usidore Zero Usidore the Door Keeper aka Password Usidore - the bouncer to the tavern Mini Avatar Usidore - the Usidore the acts as Avatar Usidore's proxy as Arnie and Chunt are shrunk down even further Depressed Usidore nicknamed Deprusidore- the Usidore that harbors all the doubt and hopelessness that Usidore Zero has. This Usidore must be kept under control. His beard has also burned off and replaced with feathers, as a reference to S1Ep75. His names are as follows: Usidore the Blue; Wizard, defaced, defamed, and defrocked; A fool and unlove-ed and none shall know me by ere any other name. Barkeep Usidore- the manager of the bar Sexy Usidore - a very heavy flirting and forward Usidore. He has blue nipples (blipples) and his fingers taste like chicken. Murder Usidore - one of the few Usidores that fight other Usidores Death Wish Usidore - one of the few Usidores that fight other Usidores. He also has a weird mustache. Animal Usidore Waiter Usidore - Their serve while at the replica of This Very Table. He is trying to make it to the big times. He is also known as Gaismunēnas May-Star-In-an-Upcomming-Production Segway to Commercial Usidore Segway Usidore - A Usidore that rides a Segway and has a dog shaped like a horn Motorized Segway Usidore - A Usidore with motors for eyes Bear Bird Turtle Pelican Bad Fuck Usidore Death Wish 2 Usidore - one of the few Usidores that fight other Usidores Confirmation Usidore - A Usidore that comfirms inquiries First Communion Usidore Personal Trainer Usidore - an almost drill sergeant-like Usidore that can be very demeaning. The Usidores in Usidore O's - small, edible Usidores that say "eat me" and turn milk blue

Chef Usidore, who may be Scam Artist Usidore - a chef that trained at the Cordon Bleu, then stealls the money at the table Taken Usidore - a deep voiced Usidore that makes many threats Cat Lover Usidore - A Usidore who plays with Séance while Arnie and Chunt enjoy the tavern. Crossword Usidore - A Usidore that mostly keeps to himself to do the crossword. He puts multiple letters in a single box Cros Sword Usidore or Two Sword Usidore - A Usidore good with Swordplay Nipple Table Usidore aka Tabledore or Usitable - the Replica of This Very Table. Known in IKEA as Zoenen Hoogstandjes Southern Gentleman Usidore Automaton Usidore John Sebastian, who is probably really John Bastion - based off his character in Offices & Bosses Frog Usidore a frog Whoosidore - an owl, can call out Chunt's antics Usidork - a nerdy Usidore Non-Stop Dance Usidore - a Usidore that loves to dance Sue-idore - the litigious wizard, ready to give out lawsuits and antagonistic ASMRidore - a very quiet Usidore Usiscore - a scorekeeper Usiwhore Usifloor - also known as Zoenen Hoogplanksus Moosidore - who moos and adds "sidore" at the end 2 Live Crewsidore Flusidore Wizard of the 12th realm of Eph-sneeze-ius Usifore EchoUsidore Golf Annoucer Usidore Golf Usidore - A golfing Usidore that holds anger for the color green since it reminds him of Spintax the Green Tight 5 Usidore McClanahan, Ruesidore - a very old school, southern belle, who is also very flirty Mountain Dewsidore - A collection of Usidores; a red, a green, and one that (potentiall) makes your penis smaller Post-Credit Usidore - Master of being After the Show, Manipulator of Post Credit Nonsense. He does scramble with his words, which proves why he does not get to talk in the main show.

There is also a mini Arnie and mini Chunt inside Avatar Usidore's hat

Recurring Characters

Earth References

• Spider-man: Turn Off the Dark
• Julie Taymor
• Freakonomics
• "Blame It On the Rain" by Milli Vanilli
• Chili's Baby Back Ribs
• "O-o-h Child" by the Five Stairsteps
• Stitcher Premium, paywall
• "Caught Up (ft. Yasmeen)" by Sonny Fodera¹
• Spartans/300 (film)
• James Cameron's Avatar
• "Sitting in a Tree (K-I-S-S-I-N-G)"
• KFC, "Finger-lickin' good"
• "If you die in a dream, will you die in real life?"
• Lids
• Applebees
• Fuddruckers
• Segways
• Death Wish & Death Wish II
• The Seven Sacraments of the Roman Catholic Church
• The Last Five Years
• After School Specials
• Jodie Foster
• Disney and Pixar's Ratatouille
• Taken Franchise
• Liam Neeson
• Coke Zero
• IKEA
• 2 Live Crew
• Golf
• Rue McClanahan
• Being John Malkovich
• Rob Schneider's "You can do it"
• Gilbert Gottfried
• IO, ImprovOlympics
• Legos

Notes

• In the beginning of the Episode, the trio are riding horses named Bunker, Johnson, and Flant
• Arnie cannot snap
• Arnie references the time that Chunt needed to have sex with the creature he wanted to shapeshift into, which has now been retconned.
• Usidore advertises his spinoff series, Usidore's Fetching Quests!
• In the past, Usidore's hat has been known as:
  • A Bed & Breakfast
  • A Room Rental
  • A Tavern
    • There is a password to get into the tavern: "Icanttellyou"
    • Names are still bring workshopped, but here are some of the suggestions:
      • The Knight (Night) Cap
      • Lids
      • Zapplebees
      • Brim and Brew
      • Fuddruckers
      • Hattie B's²
      • New Vermilion Minotaur³
    • Some of the Menu items available:
      • Assume (pronounced Ass-Su-May)
      • Baby Hat Ribs
      • Fitted Olives
      • Usidore O's
      • Mshroom Caps
      • Brim-chi
    • Some of the Drink available:
      • Spartini
      • Red Potion
      • Slumber Cup
      • Strong Dark Ale (recommended)
    • Waiter usidore Sings on your birthday
  • Storage for numerous magical objects, like his tiny horse, which then become barstools
• Arnie jokes that, in Season 7, he will make a magic hat with a tavern inside where Chunt will be beat up in.
  • They also tease that they will go to the tavern inside Usidore's Head in 40 episodes or so.

Behind the Scenes

Footnotes

1. Editor's note: I really want to say it's this, it probably isn't.

2. from S3,Ep 51

3. from S3,Ep 51