Season 3, Ep 84 - The Boy King and the Prince (w/ Jordan Morris)
Season 3, Ep 84 - The Boy King and the Prince (w/ Jordan Morris)
Hello from the Magic Tavern episode
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Air date March 29, 2021
Episode no. S03E84
Episode Link
Cast
Hosts Arnie, Chunt, Usidore
Guests Dartholomew, the Boy King, Tomblain Belaroth
Production
Producers Arnie Niekamp, Matt Young, Adal Rifai
Post-production coordination Garrett Schultz
Earwolf producer Kimmie Lucas
Editor Tim Joyce
Logo Allard Laban
Theme music Andy Poland
Special assistance Ryan DiGiorgi
Sponsor
Episode chronology
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"Tom the Secret Traveler" "Flower in the City"
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"The Boy King and the Prince" is the eighty-fourth episode of season three of Hello from the Magic Tavern. It was originally released on March 29, 2021.

Description

Prince Tomblain Belaroth encounters some unexpected competition from Dartholomew the Boy King.

Summary

Tomblain shows off his home city of Northeastia and expresses his hope to visit Arnie at his home, the Burger King. Chunt rejoins the group with Usidore as his hat. Tom gives his overview of the city, including the fate of Northeastia Alexa (a boat that Chunt used to date), the relationship between the city and magic, specialty food and drinks, attractions around, and, most importantly, the politics of the kingdom. Tom reminds the group that his father, the former King Albaine Belaroth, has died (almost five years ago from a trickster). The queen regent and Tom’s mother, Queen Titania, wants to leave the throne to go fuck the sky, which irks Tom in many ways.

While deciding what to do next in the city, Chunt spots a small, ornate carriage. Out comes Dartholomew, the Boy King of the Shrike Valley, who immediately threatens all nearby passersby. The three cohosts immediately recognize them, but Tom is instantly antagonistic as Darth is ready to take his throne. The Boy King, however, does not know Tom at all. Darth feels that he is well suited for the throne due to previously being a ruler, despite ruining his last kingdom. He gives Tom a ruler quiz, but Tom’s pacifistic experience does not help him when Darth was expecting a more ruthless answer.

Tom tries to prove his heredity to the throne by showing Darth him on the currency, the coin, of him suckling on his mother’s teat. Darth, thinking that it is a cuteness contest, shows his own adorableness, winning over everyone around. Tom counters with his political promises, but it is useless to overcome Darth’s cuteness. Darth says he could drop out of the race if Usidore performs a more permanent spell to turn him to his actual age, like back in Season 2.

In hopes to make some form of compromise between the two, Chunt notices the decrepit state of Darth’s carriage. It seems as though Darth is between kingdoms and does not have a royal entourage with him. Yet, the Boy King’s rule is inevitable with his cuteness. To see who is more deserving of the throne, Darth and Tom have a Cute-Off. Darth adorably heard dicks up a hill. Tom, thinking the ducks will secure his victory, asks Usidore to turn him into a duck. However, the duck is disturbing and Tom keeps pointing to his dick. After being turned back, Tom still believes his promises will win over the kingdom, but the crown shows him otherwise.

Arnie persuades Usidore to perform his spell to age up Darth. As Darth begs not to be older, the spell settles in and changes his interests. In the end, the crowd is not swayed by either and disperses. Arnie and company teach Darth to be an adult, ending with a simple “welp” to avoid hanging out together.

Emails

There are no new emails this week.

New characters

Recurring Characters

Earth References

  • Burger King
    • Whopper
    • Chicken Fry
    • BK shake
  • “Unique New York”
  • Myer-Briggs test
  • Billy Joel
    • “New York Alexa”
    • “We Didn’t Start the Fire”
    • “Uptown Girl”
    • “Movin Out”
  • News Segments Transitions/Political Watch
  • Slot Machine
  • Boyz to Men
  • Coppertone Sunscreen
  • Daddy after Dentist
  • Charlie Bit my Finger
  • Hims did it again
  • Jessica Simpson’s Car wash commercial
  • On Top of Old Smokey
  • Eric Clapton
  • Chasing the Dragon
  • Humpty dumpty
  • Minnesota Timberwolves
  • The Flintstones
  • The Round Girl in Boxing
  • Cake
    • “The Distance”
    • “Short Skirt, Long Jacket”
    • “I Will Survive” cover
  • Iago
  • Irish
  • Johnny Stewart
  • KIA
  • 60 minutes
  • Gorder
  • Shad Kunkle
  • Barnes & Noble
  • Amazon

Notes

  • Shad Kunkle, who the Mysterious Man calls out as the target audience for 40-year-olds going "well…", has appeared on the podcast as Simon Lemmington Bartholomew.
  • Usidore refers to Darth as King of the Shrike Valley. Darth is actually the King of Grimfallon, but Usidore is technically correct since Shrike is a part of Grimfallon.

Behind the Scenes

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