Season 3, Ep 90 - Evil Couple in the City (w/ Moujan Zolfaghari and Seth Lind of Mission to Zyxx)

Season 3, Ep 90 - Evil Couple in the City (w/ Moujan Zolfaghari and Seth Lind of Mission to Zyxx)
Hello from the Magic Tavern episode
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Air date May 10, 2021
Episode no. S03E90
Episode Link
Cast
Hosts Arnie, Chunt, Usidore
Guests Vonquestra, Telimpia, Tomblain Belaroth
Production
Producers Arnie Niekamp, Matt Young, Adal Rifai
Post-production coordination Garrett Schultz
Earwolf producer Kimmie Lucas
Editor Tim Joyce
Logo Allard Laban
Theme music Andy Poland
Special assistance Ryan DiGiorgi
Sponsor
Episode chronology
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"The Cockticklers" "Pirate Captain"
List of episodes

"Evil Couple in the City" is the ninetieth episode of season three of Hello from the Magic Tavern. It was originally released on May 10, 2021.

Description

The evil skinny dogs are back and this time they have a shop selling evil goods.

Summary

Arnie and company return to the open marketplace. Arnie has modified his intro to make sure he has time to introduce Chunt, Usidore, and now Tomblain Belaroth. Chunt had gone to a Cow Bazaar and bought a cow he named Sweet Butt, adding to his crew. Tom is working on his next book, “Do You Want to Follow Your Dreams? I Bet (Bat) You Shouldn’t”. The other three give Tom alternate titles for his book and Tom writes it all down, including anything that sounds profound. While doing so, Tom breaks his quill and runs off to buy a new one.

As the other three browse around the market, they hear some familiar voices advertising “evil fun stuff” for sale. They gravitate towards the booth and remember them from their Rune call almost a year ago; the Evil Skinny Dog Couple Vonquestra and Telimpia. The group recaps their first appearance on the podcast and what they’ve been up to. The sale currently going on is if they buy seven items, the eighth one is free. And everything they touch is an instant purchase.

Usidore immediately grabs the tambourine and inquiries about it. However, it is actually one of the few items that is not evil, so Vonquestra asks Telimpia to ruin it. Chunt picks up a finger trap, but when he puts his fingers in, the finger trap chops them off. Usidore helps him regrow the fingers. Other items include a trumpet that makes a black ring full of diseases, broken salt and pepper shakers, candles, shirts, and a free vial of poison, but only if Tomblain takes it.

Arnie continues the interview to know a little more about the couple since their last appearance. Although they “don’t” plan to take advantage of the current power vacuum. Previously, they had a travel business, but since traveling has been on the decline since the Shattering and the rise of Travel-O-City, a central portal hub, they shifted their business model. They are now in full swing in their evil trinket business, selling many of their former possessions.

The group points out the Live, Love, Love, Breathe sign and ask if that is for sale. However, the couple tells them that it is not for sale, as it is a family heirloom. Although it wasn’t inherently evil, it keeps a secret about their past: Vonquestra and Telimpia was once nice skinny dogs. Telimpia takes the tape that was on the back of the sign and played back their voices from back then. The tape showed them that they were annoying (in an not evil way) and desperate for friends. Chunt says that like them better now, which makes the couple reflect if they were more evil when they were “nice”.

Vonquestra and Teimplia also tell the group that they are now parents of twin skinny dogs. The kids come by, allowing the parents to slink away to have creepy dog sex. Usidore, Arnie, and Chunt make an effort to connect with the twins, Sylvestra and Sylvestor, hoping to turn them to the good side. The twins may be indifferent to siding with good or evil, the three show their age as they fail to connect with them meaningfully. Chunt then shows them the tape of their parents when they were their age. The twins’ parents are so embarrassing, the twins are willing to shove in their parents faces how uncool they are, making their actions more evil than good.

When Vonkistra and Telimpia come back, they are so proud of the actions of their kids. They also reveal the true evil nature of the sign (sign is backwards and says evil, evol, and stop breathing). Usidore buys the seven items that would allow him to take the free item, the sign, and flips the sign over, somehow changing the words to say “life’s a beach” They also take the poison to give to Tom, but to make sure that he has the vial and not consume it. Chunt admits that he appreciated looking after the kids, which allows Vonquestra and Telimpia to dump their kids onto Chunt for seven months.

The post-credit scene is Steve Waltien as Tomblain trying to remember the name of his character’s previous book.

Emails

There are no new emails this week.

New characters

  • Sweet Butt
  • Ballpark Frank
  • Sylvestra
  • Sylvestor

Recurring Characters

Earth References

  • Dr. Doolittle
  • “How Bizarre” by OMC
  • Ménage trois
  • Glass Menagerie
  • Chia Pet
  • Home Alone
  • “If you shoot for the moon…”
  • NiteQuil/DayQuil
  • Brunch
  • Stigmata
  • Must Love Dogs
  • Email
  • All Dogs go to Heaven
  • BBQ pits
  • Ball park Franks
  • Windowless, white van
  • Pepper spray
  • Skateboard
  • Mister Mxyzptlk
  • Novelty Shirt common sayings
  • TikTok
  • Emoji
  • “Going viral”

Notes

  • In this section of the “Podcast Family” Story, The Mysterious Man describes the children of the house ringing the podcast bell. They call the heads of the family to gather around the fireplace yet again. The little one asks “Where’s Grandpa”, to the response is that he went to a business convention. However, the grandpa hasn’t worked for decades since the mill was taken over by vines. But the mother gives a threating response, telling the child that there are just somethings they are not meant to know.
  • Vonquestra and Telimpia imply that Grimhoof is the most evil of all horses, which Usidore refuses to believe.
  • Wizards can play the trumpet using their eyes. The eye still has to make contact with the mouthpiece.
  • Skinny Dogs have a 58 day pregnancy period.
  • In the end credits, the Mysterious Man promotes Masters of Mayhem, Season 2 and calls out user NoodleBucket on Twitter.

Behind the Scenes

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