Season 4, Ep 16 - Gourd (w/ Kris Straub)

Season 4, Ep 16 - Gourd (w/ Kris Straub)
Hello from the Magic Tavern episode
Air date February 13, 2022
Episode no. S04E16
Episode Link
Hosts Arnie, Chunt, Usidore
Guests Gourd the Golem
Producers Arnie Niekamp, Matt Young, Adal Rifai
Post-production coordination Garrett Schultz
Editor Stephen Dranger
Logo Allard Laban
Theme music Andy Poland
Special assistance Ryan DiGiorgi
Episode chronology
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"Aprel Füls Visits" "Forensic Inquisitor"
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"Gourd" is the sixteenth episode of season four of Hello from the Magic Tavern. It was originally released on February 13, 2022.


A golem with a gourd for a head talks about his work with the Department of Treasure.


Chunt resolves to live his life to the fullest by engorging himself with food, a trick he had learned from Arnie. With his newly gained triple gout, Chunt can use it to obtain gems and such to sell for future medical bills caused by his weight gain. Arnie hopes to use that money to remove his pinky ring he received last week since it is cutting off his circulation. Instead, Chunt gives him more rings. Usidore prepares for a more epic death, now referring to himself and his names in the past tense. Because this death is a farce, Arnie predicts that Usidore's real death will happen on the show. Usidore gets offended and insists that Arnie will die first. In fact, Usidore does have information about his actual death, thanks to Can the Wizard. He had given Usidore a piece of paper with when and how he would die, but Usidore refuses to read it. Chunt also laments on how Twosidore knew he was going to explode on their wedding night, which Chunt interpreted differently at the time.

For the whole time the hosts have been talking, a cloaked individual has been sitting with them. To make it more dramatic, Arnie had put a sheet over today’s guest. He reveals the guest; a gourd with sticks for his limbs and body. His name is Gourd, a being conjured by a golem-like wizard. During their conversation, he realizes that his name comes from his large gourd head. As Usidore grabs drinks for the table (well for everyone, the table has had enough), Gourd describes his work with the Department of Treasure, the DOT. Gourd is responsible for the redistribution of treasure. That involves getting the treasure, replacing the treasure, and resetting the traps in the dungeon for the next adventurer. Usidore comes back with drinks and supports this method, even using the dungeons as trials to recruit adventurers on his quest. Gourd stresses some of the priorities of the DOT, such as maintaining the value of treasure and not overflooding the market, and the upkeep of dungeons for the next person.

Arnie and Chunt become curious about Gourd as a being. Chunt asks about if Gourd would want to have kids and realize that his reproductive organs are in his head. It becomes apparent to Chunt that Gourd seems to be a made-gourd and the group should be wary about how they approach Gourd, lest he turns on them. Arnie asks what Gourd does during his down time and he admits that he goes into the dungeons as an adventurer too, which may be a conflict of interest. The hosts discuss how to ethically let Gourd know that he is being recorded and is resolved by Usidore mentioning it as an off comment. In the meantime, they go into how dungeons are these days; the current fads with dungeons; differences between caves and dungeons, “modern treasures”, not being bothered by going into the dungeon and just ordering on a crystal ball. Chunt has uncounted a seller outside of a cave who was selling treasure from the cave, but did not look like they earned it.

During the interview, Gourd has been indulging in the leftovers being absorbed by his roots. At one point, Gourd was seen by Chunt gobbling up a ghoul and requested more. Due to Gourd’s fairly loose standards on morality, Usidore theories that Gourd may not have a soul and asks if he would like one. Gourd accepts after believing that his sins could be resolved by pinning it all on the newly obtained soul. After Usidore prays to the goddesses, Gourd gets his wish and gets used to the new soul, which makes him realize that he’s probably evil. However, when Usidore asks if Gourd would like the souls removed, he asks for four more. It becomes too much and Gourd tries to burp the souls out. He does not regret the attempt, but knows now that it was a mistake to put souls into him.

Since Gourd has been drinking, he cannot remember if the bag he has with him is going to a new dungeon or coming out. The group asks Arnie to remember some context clues, but all he could remember is that Gourd had a giant gourd for a head. When Gourd opens the bag to figure it out, he realizes that it is not treasure at all and he can cross off a name from a list of people he doesn’t have to keep track of anymore. Although Chunt is still jumpy, the hosts hope Gourd can come back to the show, still within his good standings and maybe Arnie will explain how human babies are made to him.


There are no new emails this week.

New Characters

  • Quowey, the Minimum Bear and the Mascot of doing the Bare Minimum

Recurring Characters

Earth References

  • Neil Young
  • Deadpool
  • Department of the Treasury
  • Grinding (video games)
  • collector items (never remove from box)
  • shooting blanks
  • NFTs
  • Trapt
  • feng shui
  • Mario Kart/ghost racers
  • Mafia
  • Video Game Puzzles
  • The Godfather
  • Ludacris
  • Instacart/Ordering Online
  • "Does a Bear Shit in the Woods?"/"If a tree falls in the woods…"
  • Charmin Toilet Paper
  • gabagool
  • Goodfellas
  • Collective Soul
  • Soul Coughing
  • Soul Asylum
  • Soul Train
  • De La Soul
  • soul food
  • Soulja Boy
  • The Smashing Pumpkins
    • "Tonight, Tonight"
    • Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness
    • "Disarm"
    • Kim Cattrall
    • Wilhelm scream


Behind the Scenes

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