Season 4, Ep 34 - Cowboy World: Railroad Baron

Season 4, Ep 34 - Cowboy World: Railroad Baron
Hello from the Magic Tavern episode
Air date July 10, 2022
Episode no. S04E34
Episode Link
Hosts Arnie, Champ, Ulysses
Guests Solomon Ragoon
Producers Arnie Niekamp, Matt Young, Adal Rifai
Post-production coordination Garrett Schultz
Editor Sage G.C.
Logo Allard Laban
Theme music Andy Poland
Special assistance Ryan DiGiorgi
Additional music Aric Jacover
Episode chronology
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"Cowboy World: Railroad Baron" is the thirty-fourth episode of season four of Hello from the Magic Tavern. It was originally released on July 10, 2022.


Arnie, Ulysses and Champ the Horse talk to Solomon Ragoon, the Cowboy World's Railroad Baron.


A noticeably different Arnie intros the podcast and introduces his two usual co-hosts. However, Champ is not with them; rather, it's Cookie, an old-timey prospector who likes to take off his pants at any given opportunity. After getting bit by a copperhead snake, he wished to to be on the podcast, rather than to be cured of his ailment. Soon enough, he dies at the table and Champ moves the body over to join the others. Arnie begins to ask unusual questions and it tips off Champ and Ulysses that Arnie may have gone "craisin". Arnie struggles to tell them that he is not Cowboy World Arnie, but Arnie from Foon that came with Usidore. The two, however, do not believe him and hold him down to lobotomize him. Usidore joins the group and Arnie begs him to vouch for him, only for Usidore to join in restraining Arnie.

An affluent individual enters the Burgundy Broncho; Solomon Ragoon, the Railroad Baron. Arnie fishes for information about Solomon Ragoon, seeing if he is supposed to know anything about him. Still, he invites the Railroad Baron for the podcast. Ulysses has more of an antagonistic relationship with Solomon Ragoon and it shows within his questioning. Meanwhile, Champ asks the important question: why is Ragoon here? Solomon Ragoon boasts his accomplishments that are outside as he has completed the Ragoon Rail System connection into Hogswood. Despite previously going over his backstory in previous episodes of Hello from the Dusty Saloon, Solomon Ragoon shares it with Arnie. His father was trampled by a rich man when Solomon was 7 and was given a quarter of a shaving of a penny in compensation. He used that fraction of a coin as the first step of his Railroad empire, despite already inheriting $100,000 upon his father's death. The story of his life has been cataloged in an autobiography called "The Story of My Life".

While Arnie ask Usidore how he is doing with his ruse, Solomon Ragoon confides in Champ in Arnie's different demeanor. After a quick game of "Spot the Differences", it finally clicks in his brain that this is a totally different Arnie than the Arnie they are used to. Solomon Ragoon is incredulous, as this Arnie looks like the Arnie that sucked venom out of his butt. Arnie explains that he and Usidore are from another "another" world, and the Railroad Baron gets suspiciously excited and buys a round of drinks for the saloon. Solomon Ragoon offers the group to ask him more questions. Trying to find more similarities with Baron Ragoon, Usidore asks about Solomon's children. He has 15 kids and is notified immediately when new ones pop up. Although he tolerates his kids, the same can't be said for his wife as he placed her on a submarine.

Solomon Ragoon brags about his friends in high places. In Capital City, he has garnered influence thanks to the assistance of President Donny Lord and Vice President Durango LeDespare. Unfortunately, the assassination of the former by the latter has the city in a weakened state. Still, he has enough clout to flaunt at the upcoming Hogswood Annual Shootout next week. Arnie takes Champ and Ulysses aside and proposes Masters of Industry, a spin-off that follows Solomon Ragoon and Durango LeDespare. The hosts give their take on theme songs for it before going down the list of participants for the shootout.

The hosts mention that Miss Quibbert will be entering the shootout, but Solomon Ragoon is not shaken. He openly boasts his acquisition of Professor Quibber's sex robots for railroad work and unsubtly tells the tale of his involvement with the Professor's death. He also has not shared with Miss Quibbert a document that gives Solomon Ragoon a controlling share of the company. Ulysses admonishes his villainy and swears to Ragoon's defeat, as they have defeated him in the past. Champ calls over Graham, a messenger to share the message to the world while Ragoon tells Graham to go to the Ragoon Times.

Ulysses seems more eager to join the Shootout, but it seems Arnie (or at least Cowboy World Arnie) is already signed up. Champ asks Arnie how fast he can draw. Arnie gets the opportunity to try with Cookie's gun, but his drop causes a chain reaction that results in Usidore being bit in the butt by a copperhead snake, Knowing that Usidore would probably not die from the injury, he refuses to suck the poison, so Champ takes his place. However, Champ accidentally swallows the poison, so Arnie has no choice but to suck the poison out of Champ's mouth.

The hosts think of other ways to win at the shootout and they resolve to change it into a rock-paper-scissors game. Arnie asks what the winner wins, which is to continue living,a basket full of rhubarb, the fear of the town, $500,000, and a choice of nickname. With such high stakes for such small rewards, Arnie fears that he would immediately die in Cowboy World after surviving Foon. Usidore points out that he was mortally wounded with a sword and Arnie shows off to the table his ass when he is meant to show off his scar.


There are no new emails this week.

New Characters

  • Cookie, the old gold miner
  • Ragoon's Barkeep
  • Graham, the messenger to tell things
  • Durango LeDespare, former vice president of Capital City
  • Hogswood Annual Shootout Competitors:
    • Kid
    • Dutch
    • Biggins
    • Crook
    • Scar
    • Scars
    • Scar Times Three
    • Teeth
    • Crooked Smile
    • Claudia
    • Stars
    • Encore
    • Cinemax
    • Pimply Nipplebottom
    • Grump
    • Hobo Max
    • Dr. Piss & Grump
  • Coronal Vorpal

Recurring Characters

Earth References

  • Make-a-Wish Foundation
  • Adam Sandler
    • Billy Madison
    • Happy Gilmore
    • "shabadoo"
    • The Waterboy
    • Uncut Gems
    • Hustle
  • OSHA
  • Champagne, France
  • Monopoly
    • Rent with Houses and Hotels
    • Community Chest
    • Winning a Beauty Pageant
    • Being the Banker
  • Elon Musk
  • Pulp Fiction
  • "Common People" by Pulp
  • The Story of Us
  • Tatiana Maslany
  • Spot the Difference
  • Internet Hotspot
  • telegrams
  • The Sound of Music
    • The Van Trap Family
    • Do-Re-Mi
  • Stars
  • Encore
  • Cinemax
  • Blade Franchise
  • Spider-Man
  • Batman
    • Batman Begins
    • "Because he's the hero Gotham deserves, but not the one it needs right now."
    • Gotham
  • "There's a Snake in my Boot"
  • Opus comic
  • Wooden Overcoats Podcast
  • Mousetrap
  • Bible
  • Rochambeau


  • When Champ and Ulysses think Arnie has gone crazy, insinuating a "Carnie" situation, the group makes a direct reference to Carnival Wilson.
  • During Cowboy World Arnie's time in High Foon, there are some noticeable changes to his appearance compared to the other Arnie.
    • He has his earlobe shot off by Ulysses.
    • He has the haunted look of someone who has dropped a child down a mine shaft.
  • At the end of Season 2 of Hello from the Dusty Saloon, Solomon Ragoon tried to reach for both of his six guns. However, his pants fell down and a rattlesnake bit him on the butt for the second time.
  • Solomon Ragoon was not invited to the hosts Barn Raising, the High Foon equivalent of the Book Club.

Behind the Scenes

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